If someone were to ask me what the secret to a good marriage is, I wouldn’t know what to answer. I could give you a list of qualities that makes my marriage perfect for me. But that might not be perfect for you.
I believe opposites “attract”, but I don’t think opposites last. I think in order to live-with and love someone for life, you have to be like-minded: you know, like some of the same things, want some of the same things. (you don’t have to have everything in common. Differences are fun too.)
For me there MUST be kindness and respect and trust. Scott was born with kindness. The respect and trust he extended to me in the beginning was a HUGE leap of faith. HUGE! And it was tested greatly, in the beginning.
I was still so immature in many ways, with a damaged set of expectations from trying to make incompatible relationships work. I had a lot of growing up still to do. He was patient.
And then, over time, I realized he wasn’t going anywhere. He wasn’t leaving. He loved me even though I was flawed. He wanted me, no matter what. What on EARTH had I done to deserve this man?!? I don’t deserve him. I don’t. But, for some reason, he loves me.
He wanted a family too. I wanted to be a Mom with all my heart! We struggled with fertility issues, but God gave us two boys. Two boys! Two of them!
Two babies in three years! It was unbelievable, full and fun, tiring but most of all SHORT. We made magical memories in Iowa when our family was young! Pure magic!
And now, just a few, short years later, Will is 13, Scotty is almost 12 and at 5’10’, he towers over me. Scott went solid gray in the last five years and gained the sexiest aura about him. He’s come into his insight and wisdom at a very early age and I’m amazed by him every single day.
He’s a great Dad, such a good role model for our boys. They love him to death! But they aren’t old enough yet to know how truly blessed they are to have him.
And someday soon, before we know it, it’ll just be the two of us again. And no doubt I’ll still test his limits and I’ll be blown away when he continues to love me.
We are better than I ever imagined, babe!